has 171 time to read2010-6-21 07:37|personal category:Boys Talk|keywords:reflection Fathers Day
Hello friends, it has been a while since I have
wrote a blog on this site. I have to say. I have been taking life
slowly. I brought my little girl out for fathers day, and bought her a
necklace while we were out today. For the
most part I had a lot of fun with my baby. Well she is 7 now but she
will always be my baby. I how ever feel like a failure. Her real mom is a
loser, and well she loved my Ex wife, but I messed up that
relationship. I left her for Paulette, a woman that gave me love like I
always wanted. Now that she is gone I can see that my daughter misses
having a mom figure around, since her real mom don't really take her on
her days anymore. As a single father and care giver of my daughter
Holly, I feel devastated that I cant give that other half of what my
daughter needs to her. Last night I was so depressed I couldn't sleep
and hoped to sleep through fathers day so I wouldn't have to feel like
this. I love my baby so much, I would give my life for her, no questions
asked. I want to have a complete family, but I am so scared of love at
times. This last break up really broke my heart. I am ready to give my
heart to that special girl, but I will say this. Before I commit my self
to marriage, I want a few things. More children, devotion, commitment
to go to church with me, and time together. I do hope I find that dream
soon.
